My children have all moved out and bought homes of their own and because they are in a growing mode and my husband and I are now in shrinking mode, it makes sense to pass along household items that are still of use and can be better utilized to a start-up household, so we offered out furniture, recreational items, and linens, now better suited to a growing family.
While sorting through the many videos and DVD’s we’d accumulated it dawned on me that my husband and I are no longer building a life, rather we are starting to wind it down. This was a startling revelation. For the past several years I‘d considered myself to be middle-aged but I realize now, that would mean living until I was 110 and that’s not going to happen, so I have to face reality. Truth is, it went by really fast.
When I hold my granddaughters I could swear it was just a couple of years ago I held their mother the same way. Has it really been 30 plus years? My only regret is that I couldn’t have slowed it down and if, at any time, I neglected to ‘stop and smell the roses’, it’s now too late because that bloom is now off that rose, and I can only hope for another opportunity to blossom.
After much deliberation I came to realize that opportunity presents itself every day, and this bit of wisdom only came with maturity. My life was so busy with jobs, and family, and car pools, and school…it all seemed like a blur and I fear I missed some wonderful moments because I didn’t take the time to really appreciate them, so focused was I on just getting through the days. Now when I look around, I see a host of special moments. Not all are mine, but that’s ok. I now see any moment as an opportunity to stop and reflect on its’ importance, and I’d like to think I now carry that lesson so that others can benefit.
If I can teach anyone younger, anything at all, it would be to make yourself consciously aware of each moment before it slips away. Take the time every day to find something beautiful in something very ordinary. It doesn’t have to be a lot of time because, as we know, life has a way of ‘getting in the way’, so choose your moment and make it count because once it’s gone it’ll never present itself in that way again. Look for the value in everything and everyone….don’t let a busy state hinder your path to growth.
There is a very distinct pattern to our lives and if I had to map its’ path it would look like a wagon wheel. We are all meant to explore, question, learn, and process; taking avenues off our core route to broaden our knowledge, and returning to its’ centre to continue on our journey. The results fashion our personal profile, and ignoring those ‘moments’ denies us our opportunity for spiritual growth….and yes, this too is a lesson that comes with maturity.
Better late than never.
2 thoughts on “Coming full circle”
I feel the same way…sometimes I wish I could raise my family again…they are all doing well….but I would’ve done some things differently…who really cared if the dining room buffet had dust on it but my youngest said….mom if you hadn’t gone back to work, we wouldn’t have known how to do things like laundry and cook etc…not that they had to do a lot. The only chores which rotated every week was ..fold laundry …only towels and socks as I was fussy ….Unload dishwasher …again fussy…now I think how silly….and vacuum …and she said we wouldn’t have had all those Christmases at Disney but I do wish I could turn back time…I would’ve spent more time playing games etc but….they are all healthy and have good jobs and are nice people so I guess we did something right
When I look back it feels like everything up until 50 was just practice. That the real me of me didn’t even begin to emerge (in a big way) until then.