Beauty is natural. Don’t mess with it. We all want to look perfect but the reality is we never can, because beauty really is in the eye of the beholder and every ‘beholder’ sees us differently.

Why then, does society put so much emphasis on physical appearance? Every woman aspires to be Barbie, every man, Ken, and when we don’t fit that mold, we go to crazy lengths to change ourselves. I have to admit that women are guiltier of this practice than men, by far; few men go to the trouble and expense women do to change their appearance. Men are however, guilty of putting pressure on women to be beautiful. They openly stare at pretty females, often ignoring the one they’re with. Some whistle, some drool. Locker room conversations revolve around who’s ‘hot’, and no man is willing to go on a blind date until he sees a photo first. She could be the stupidest creature to walk the planet, but if she’s good looking they could easily be persuaded to devote their lives to her cause every guy wants a Babe. The lanky brunette, or the busty blonde; the picture perfect female, and sadly, there’s a host of women in society only too willing to accommodate. A nip here, a tuck there, takes care of any imperfections of the body. Breast enhancement, rump implants (ok, I will NEVER understand this one….who wants a big ass?) and liposuction, lead the way for popular procedures.  Cosmetic surgery is now routine and for several thousand dollars you too can have the perfectly aligned face.

Why are we so eager to create a society of Stepford Wives?  What happened to individuality, but more importantly, why can’t we be happy with what nature gave us? Have we become so superficial that we can only be satisfied with a pretty package? Or is it that we’re so insecure we need to change ourselves to what society wants in order to be accepted?

I recently heard an advertisement for permanent make-up. This is make-up that is tattooed right onto your face. New bold eye brows, red lips, rosy cheeks, and permanent eye shadow (how weird would that look waking up in the morning?) And of course, you have to have the new “Bambi’ eyelashes; 2 inches of lash framing your eyes, yeah, that looks natural. (am I the only one who finds it ironic that we spend money in one place to have body hair removed, then pay someone else to have it glued into our eyelids and scalp?)

Nail salons are everywhere and it used to be for basic manicures and pedicures. Now, ‘nail technicians’ (manicurists are no more) build your nails up with permanent gel, adorned with detailed art work and embedded gem stones. They are square or seriously pointy and often unnaturally long, resembling talons. (how do you pull up your stockings without shredding them?) And if the unnatural appearance doesn’t dissuade you, what about the health risk? Depriving your nail bed of air can permanently damage it. Just google it on the internet – the images are alarming (and ugly)

Don’t misunderstand me, I’m as vain as the next woman. I colour my hair, I wear make-up (that I wash off each night) I paint my nails (my nails, the kind that grow), and yes, I will even admit to occasionally donning industrial strength under garments to ensure any excess of me remains in check, but I draw the line at any type of surgery or procedure that permanently alters my physical body. This is me, and I like me just the way I am. (ok, ok, I’d like to have different hair, longer legs, and sure, there are aspects of my face that I’d fine tune, but I’m not willing to undergo surgery or inject myself with dye to get that change) I figure if you don’t like it, don’t look.

I see something beautiful in everyone I meet. I taught myself that years ago and it was the most liberating feeling because when I stopped seeing what was wrong in another and focused on what was right, I started seeing myself in a different light, and nothing builds up your self esteem like looking into a mirror and appreciating the reflection, in all its’ glory, and with all its’ flaws, because it’s honest, and real. Finding the beauty in others helped me to find the beauty within myself and it’s an exercise I strongly recommend. Maybe they have great hair, or maybe great legs, soleful eyes, or a dazzling smile – everybody has something wonderfully unique and beautiful to gaze at, and once you get in the habit of looking for beauty, you’ll find it is everywhere.

Here’s to loving yourself, just the way you are. I do.